Just Between Friends

You know that one relative? The one who can’t take no for an answer, and consistently overestimates the closeness of their relationships? The one who brings up donor insemination (no, they’re not telling me about their plans, BTW) unprompted… (Yeah. That last one really is just me, isn’t it?) **sigh** They’re heeee—earrr.

I have no idea why they’re here. But they are. They is. They… what the hell verb goes with my gender-neutral singular they?

I’m gearing up for the next round of “I would really regret…” A game in which they criticize my life under the pretense offering advice, and I respond with an assortment of things I would regret not doing, as if the topic were actually regrets, and not why I’m not (Married, having children, discovering the cure for cancer, back in school, or swimming the English Channel).

It’s a strange time for a game of “I would really regret,” because truth be told, one of us should be on the other end of the country, spending time with their spouse who is in the hospital. Frankly, I think it’s denial. End-of-Life issues.

It seems like the checkmate “I would really regret” is in there, somewhere…

And I can’t use it.

Damn it.

I really probably would regret mentioning that I’d regret not spending time with my spouse. (eventually.)(Although…)

The weird thing is, for all the fake closeness… I’m actually not sure they would. I’m not sure they do real closeness all that well.

The part that puzzles me is whether they know how bad they are at closeness, or if they truly believe they’re doing well. Is it all for show? Or…

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